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<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by gorton:
<font size=8 color="red">.</font> </div></BLOCKQUOTE>fixed for you CP

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by PARAGON:
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by gorton:
<font size=8 color="red">.</font> </div></BLOCKQUOTE>fixed for you CP

</div></BLOCKQUOTE>

OMG, that was a good edit.

</div></BLOCKQUOTE>

SHOW OFF!!

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by h2co-pilot:
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by DRTYFN:
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by Mrs. Desert Fox:
Here's for Andy: Female/Male Prayer

Female Prayer:

I pray for a rich deaf-mute nymphomanic
Who's looks good and is great in the sac
One that doesn't know how to operate the remote control
And doesn't have a hairy mole (it works)
A stud that knows how to make me laugh
and can use his tongue like a giraffe
Fills up my gas tank and changes my oil
And knows that I am the princess that he needs to spoil

Male Prayer:

I pray for a deaf-mute nymphomaniac with big tits who owns a liquor store and a Hummer. This doesn't rhyme and I don't give a f**k. Amen. </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

Fixed

</div></BLOCKQUOTE>

Fixed again.

</div></BLOCKQUOTE>

________________________________________

Well, you have just confirmed that you are as intelligent as I thought you were..........except for the last line............. personally I spoil myself!!
Good job Co-Pilot!!

This old married couple are sitting having a serious conversation about the fact that when they go to bed every night she has to deal with his constant obnoxious farting all night long. The old man turns to his wife and says "It's a perfectly natural thing to do, sorry". The old woman resigns to the fact that she will never get him to stop farting in bed. Months go by and finally one day the wife asks again "please, can you stop farting like that in bed?". The old man says once again "It's a perfectly natural thing to do". She replies "One of these days you are going to blow your guts out with those farts!".

Right around the holidays she forms a plan, wakes up early to start the turkey, and takes all of the guts from inside the turkey and puts them on a plate. She sneeks in to the room while he is still sleeping, lifts up his drawers, and slips the guts in. She leaves the room trying not to laugh out loud and waits in the kitchen for the next loud fart! All of a sudden she hears this huge *?@&** of a fart, then she hears him scream and race to the bathroom. She's rolling on the ground laughing as she hears the bathroom door open. As he comes down the hallway she calmy asks "What happened?". He says "You were right. It finally happened. I finally blew my guts out. But by the grace of God, two fingers and some vaseline, I think I got them all back in there!"

A blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red sports car and was pulled over by a woman police officer who
was also a blonde. The blonde cop asked to see the blonde driver's license.
She dug through her purse and was getting progressively more agitated.
"What does it look like?" she finally asked.
The policewoman replied, "It's square and it has your picture on it."
The driver finally found a square mirror in her purse, looked at it and handed it to the policewoman. "Here it is," she said.
The blonde officer looked at the mirror, then handed it back saying, "Okay, you can go. I didn't realize you were a cop."

Cooking Eggs

A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband. Suddenly her husband burst into the kitchen.
"Careful ... CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my GOD! you're cooking too many at once. TOO MANY!
Turn them! TURN THEM NOW! We need more butter. Oh my GOD! WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER? They're going to STICK! Careful ... CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL!
You NEVER listen to me when you're cooking! Never!
Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind? Don't forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them. Use the salt. USE THE SALT!
THE SALT!"

The wife stared at him. "What the hell is wrong with you? You think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?"

The husband calmly replied, "I wanted to show you what it feels like when I'm driving with you in the car.

That was truly funny!! But now you have created a dilemna!! My hubby is going to read this and I'm going to be hearing this joke until the day I die!! Thanks alot!

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">My hubby is going to read this and I'm going to be hearing this joke until the day I die!! Thanks alot! </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

Always here top help in any way I can

True story, just happened:

My husband says to me "So...how we doing on money?"

With a "what's he going to do" look, I say "Why?".

He says "Because I want that GPS unit for the Hummer"

I say "I would prefer the light package"

He says "Okay, I'm sure it would look great on your vette!"

I didn't think that was funny.

Someone out there create a picture of a convertable vette with a front, rear and side light package! Please, oh please!

mr drool, I dont have a high priced house on the beach or a lavish home. I am also not rich. I do probably loose more money in the couch cushions than you make all year long . But regardless if you dont like hummers go **** yourself, I dont like jeeps either, but i dont come over to your jeep forum and piss on your parade.

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by MR Tool:
It's simple really. The proof is in the pudding.

Check out the "off-roading" section on THIS forum.
Page 1 has posts from 2003. There is only 2 pages total.

I went wheeling with 1200+ Jeeps this weekend. I'll bet that of all the hummers sold to the public less than 1200 have ever been off-road.

Hummers have an "online community"

Jeeps have a "off-road" community.

You people do amuse me though, some will argue "Why does it always come back to money??" as a defense, then flaunt in another thread about thier lavish homes on the beach, high priced sports car blah blah..

It's really no surprise why hummer owners are "dissed" by off-roaders. You have earned it.

It's also no suprise why I have noticed a few people leave here in the last few months. Not trolls, but informative intelligent people.

and a little something for PARAGON: I reside where 99% of domestic vehicles are designed, I work everyday with people who design these vehicles. I then build the machines that manufacture these vehicles. GM, FORD, D/C, and a few others. The design of vehicles is generally 3-4 years BEFORE production. So for me to pass on information to a pathetic POS like yourself just so I could put a "owned" smiley next to it would be assnine.

That's the who, what, and where for you. </div></BLOCKQUOTE>Who are you and why did you use my name in your post?

BAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

That's the who, what, and where for you. </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

So what exactly is your point? Is it that most Hummer owners don't take them off road? If that is your point, agreed, now tell us something that we don't already know. I may be missing something but where were the Hummer owners flaunting anything? If you are talking about pic that's show homes or other vehicles sure, they are here. Don't recall ever seeing one where the person posting said anything like look at my expensive things unless they posted the pic to prove they had what they said they had to a troll like you. So you went wheeling with 1200+ jeeps this weekend and you think that is more than the total number of Hummers that have been off road. Your point again is what. If you had a brain in your head you would realize that there has got to be a minimum of 200, if not 2,000, jeep on the road for every single Hummer. Of course there are going to be more jeeps on the trail, go figure. I actually counted one day last week how many jeeps and Hummers I saw driving around. At the end of the day I say 5 Hummers and I lost count on the jeeps at about 120. I would bet that at least 90% of the jeeps I saw will never see anything worse than a gravel road. Does that change anything about the jeeps capability? No it doesn't, so maybe you should wrap this around your tiny little brain. Whether a Hummer is taken off road or not, it is still a more than capable off road vehicle and at some point you will have to admit it to yourself. I know you and your little jeep feel threatened by Hummers but it will be ok, there is room enough for both on the trail.