Haircut OMG!!!!
 

I went to the barbershop up the street to get my hairs cut and was promptly seated in Greene's chair. He seems to be a nice old codger, but I'm pretty antisocial in these settings so as long as he doesn't want to chat, he's ok with me.

I tell Greene I want a #4 on the sides, a little longer on the top and taper the back. My usual.

"Yes sir", he says and procedes to spend an inordinate amount of time getting the shears ready. Curious, I turn around and see him struggling with the attachment. WTH? Look at him s-H-a-K-i-n-G. Holy crap!!!

It's together and he's lurching for my head! Change of plans... NOW!!! "Hey Greene, just make it a #4 all over."

"Yes sir."

Phew. I was proud. I avoided what was sure to be a disaster. He's doing a nice, albeit slow, job. He even put some mousse in my hair to pull up the stragglers and recut it. Nice.

WRONG!!! Then it hits me like a Mack truck hitting a duck; he still has to clean up my neck and around my ears and the barbers here use a straight blade!!! Maybe he won't use it....

CRAP!!!! He's sharpening the damn thing. Just slapping it back and forth on the leather like a hungry butcher. Damn, damn, damn...

My hands clinch my pants as he lurches in to battle my goose bump covered neck. I can hear and feel the blade as it moves up and down. WTH was that? It's not supposed to go SIDEWAYS!!! Is that blood I feel? What's going on back there? This is taking forever!!! Please, please, please, just finish...

Then it really hit me. Those balloon-in-a-hurricane hands with that Samuari sword still have to trim around my ears!!! OMFG!!!!

He finishes the neck one hair at a time, one goose bump at a time. My teeth are grinding.

He moves to my side and grapples with my ear. Ah-ha, got it!!! Damn, this isn't good. I think I chipped a tooth.

As he attempts to work behind my ear I glance up to the mirror and notice the horror on my face. Clinched mouth, squinty eyes, red face.

I see a waiting woman staring at me with nearly the identical look. She knows she's watching a train wreck. I think I see a tear.

Scrape, scrape, scrape as he grunts his way through... one hair at a time...

One ear to go and he'll be done.

Oh no!!! I shouldn't have looked in the mirror again. He's brandishing the blade like a kid waving at Sponge Bob!!! OMFG just kill me now!!!

Greene uses his meathook of a hand and struggles to seize my ear. He's got it and off he goes. Lay a piece of tuna in front of him blindfolded and you'd have a fine piece of sushi in no time. Is that blood? No...

He's done!!!! That's it. I jump up, grab the airgun and hose off, pay, tip and I'm outta there!!!!

Re: Haircut OMG!!!!
 

THIS THREAD IS WORTHLESS WITHOUT PICS:fdance: :beerchug: :fdance: ......HAHAHA

Re: Haircut OMG!!!!
 

I bet it was something like this... if not this.