I hope they're both all right, but how about these alternate headlines ...
"Eco-rage in U.S. reaches new high with San Diego attack"
"Toyota crushes median flowers defending highway from Hummer"
"Bravery of Toyota driver against Hummers inspires schoolchildren"
"Medical methadone ineffective at curbing ecoterror flashback, 2 hospitalized"
"Highway closed after bizarre twist in 'pay-it-forward' movement"
