After you die....

[h2co-pilot]

What do you want done with your body? Do you have funeral plans?

[PARAGON]

We have a prepaid deal for my wife with this company to cook her and I'll get them to turn her ashes into a diamond and give that to the second wife as an engagement ring.

[KenP]

I've instructed CP to keep me at home. Minutes before it appears I will pass on she is to give me a final, lethal dose of Viagra. This way she can keep me in the love bed forever.

If she goes first, we have a standing order with K-Y for 20 cases. I'll be able to keep her around too.

Aren't we thoughtful of each other?!

[Mr. I - Man]

Thats Fawking beautiful Paragon! You can read that my passing after everyones ears stop ringing and bleeding and the taste of C-4, burnt flesh, guts and Jack has left their pallets.

[PARAGON]

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by Alec W:
No plans. Don't care. I'll be dead. </div></BLOCKQUOTE>Think about Fred

[ree]

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by h2co-pilot:
...

When I'm dead, I can f<span class="ev_code_BLACK">u</span>ck whoever I want. </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

That's a little optimistic. I'm not sure the Bible (or whatever book you believe in) says that's allowed.

[TootsSUT]

Put me in robed clothing w/ a flower wreath around my head, cast me in plaster and lay me next to these people in Pompeii so people from all over the world can travel long distances and pay lots of money to come in and see me!!

[PARAGON]

Day is done,
gone the sun,
From the hills,
from the lake,
From the skies.
All is well,
safely rest,
God is nigh.
Go to sleep,
peaceful sleep,
May the soldier
or sailor,
God keep.
On the land
or the deep,
Safe in sleep.

Love, good night,
Must thou go,
When the day,
And the night
Need thee so?
All is well.
Speedeth all
To their rest.

Fades the light;
And afar
Goeth day,
And the stars
Shineth bright,
Fare thee well;
Day has gone,
Night is on.

Thanks and praise,
For our days,
'Neath the sun,
Neath the stars,
'Neath the sky,
As we go,
This we know,
God is nigh.

[h2co-pilot]

What do you want done with your body? Do you have funeral plans?

[PARAGON]

I have very detailed plans for how my ashes will be interned in a specially built, small rocket and launched over a special piece of land. In the middle of the ashes will be an explosive charge with small cupped ceramics that upon exploding at the correct altitude will spread the ashes over the area forever bonding me with the land that already holds some of my blood.

It will be a specific time in the morning on a specific date. No Taps, no Marine Corps guard, no 21 guns, only Regimental Pipers.

No people except my wife and my two kids.

[rodster]

1. Cremate.

2. Throw a party, not a funeral. Island music, aloha shirts required.

3. Prior to party starting, mix ashes in margarita machine.

4. Have party and when everyone is good and toasted on margaritas, announce:

"Rod has one final request -- EAT ME!"

"You just did."

[CO Hummer]

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by GMPartsGuy:
Just my body, a boat, surrounded with kindling on a lake .... </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

Would that be the the Lake of Fire?

[DRTYFN]

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by h2co-pilot:
What do you want done with your body? Do you have funeral plans? </div></BLOCKQUOTE>
Bring out yer dead!!!

[PARAGON]

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by Tootsie:
Put me in robed clothing w/ a flower wreath around my head, cast me in plaster and lay me next to these people in Pompeii so people from all over the world can travel long distances and pay lots of money to come in and see me!! </div></BLOCKQUOTE>I thought people already paid to see you like that over here, sans the plaster and the robe.

[ree]

Cremate, and not put in an Nestle Quik can.

No funeral plans, yet. I've still got adult family that'll get my money and can figure it out if they need to.

[fourfourto]

Cremated .Theres a company that will send 8 grams of your ashes into orbit around earth for $12,000.00 and into deep space for $5,000.00.Another company will take about 1/3 rd of the ashes and in 3 to 6 months they can make a diamond out of it for those who live on.
Below is pic I used on another thread (I came upon this old cemetery deep in the woods)makes you think.

[Mr. I - Man]

I have instructed my father and brother to take my Blues Dressed corpse out to the desert, prop me up with a Hustler under one arm and a Bottle of Jack in my right hand, on top of a well placed satchel charge and blow me to the wind scattering me across the desert.

Gotta go out with a bang!

[h2co-pilot]

I read somewhere that the guy that invented disc golf had some specialty frisbees made.

Edit: Yep, his name was Steady Ed.

[JamesT]

I have instructed my wife and attorney to sell me as a cadaver to the local UT Health Science Center and School. A human cadaver is worth $68.00 today. My wife is instructed to use the money for what ever she wishes. No joke...I have this in writting.

[NoMoGMPG]

Just my body, a boat, surrounded with kindling on a lake looking for that flaming arrow to set me free. Valhalla awaits.