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Go Back   Hummer Forums by Elcova > ETC. Forums > General Off Topic

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  #1  
Old 07-08-2008, 07:51 AM
05h2sut 05h2sut is offline
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Default Political Correctness

Due to the climate of political correctness now pervading America,
Kentuckians, Tennesseans and West Virginians will no longer be referred to as'HILLBILLIES.'

You must now refer to them as APPALACHIAN-AMERICANS.

Furthermore

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1. She is not a 'BABE' or a 'CHICK' - She is a 'BREASTED AMERICAN.'
2. She is not 'EASY' - She is 'HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE.'
3. She is not a 'DUMB BLONDE' - She is a 'LIGHT-HAIRED DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY.'
4. She has not 'BEEN AROUND' - She is a 'PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION.'
5. She does not 'NAG' you - She becomes 'VERBALLY REPETITIVE.'
6. She is not a 'TWO-BIT HOOKER' - She is a 'LOW COST PROVIDER.'

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1. He does not have a 'BEER GUT' - He has developed a 'LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY.'
2. He is not a 'BAD DANCER' - He is 'OVERLY CAUCASIAN.'
3. He does not 'GET LOST ALL THE TIME' - He 'INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS.'
4. He is not 'BALDING' - He is in 'FOLLICLE REGRESSION.'
5. He does not act like a 'TOTAL ASS' - He develops a case of RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION.'
6. It's not his 'CRACK' you see hanging out of his pants - It's 'REAR CLEAVAGE.'
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  #2  
Old 07-08-2008, 09:14 AM
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HUMMERcustoms.com/TAZ HUMMERcustoms.com/TAZ is offline
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Default Re: Political Correctness

Do not forget Arkansans have always been considered Hillbillies. We do not have the Appilachian mountains but, if you draw a line from northeast corner to the southwest corner of AR, north of that line we have the Ozark Mountains so we are Ozark-Americans.

Now for those south of that line is Delta in Southeast (which B. Clinton promised to make prosperious as Gov. failed but, with money they have now could succeed). Southcentral is delta, farming, & timber. Southwest is forestry considered Ozark foothills. So I say all these sections are on their own as far as sorting out the political correctness.

I know I am Ozark-American that is in Follicle Regression which now explains my propendency to often express myself with severe Cranial-Rectal Inversion.
This in turn caused me, with good reason mind you, to throw out several years back the Light-Haired Detour Off The Information Superhighway because she had just become way to Horizontally Accessible which just created a vicious circle of Follicle Regression and Cranial-Rectal Inversion.

I'm proud to say that after source of stress was gone I recovered nicely and have little trouble with past personal problems.

TAZ
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Old 07-08-2008, 02:32 PM
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Default Re: Political Correctness

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