"The Boys of HUMMER"

[Jason]

Fun read:

The boys of Hummer

By WRIGHT THOMPSON, The Kansas City Star

SURPRISE, Ariz. — Yeah, yeah, professional baseball is about World Series rings and pennants and game-ending home runs. But come on, let's be real. All those things are just a means to an end, a way for athletes to get what they really want: big trucks. Huge freakin' trucks. And if they add some huge rims, well, all the better.


The current SUV du jour is the H2, and the players' parking lots this spring seem like Hummer dealerships. From the looks of it, if it weren't for pro athletes, the hybrid ex-Army tanks wouldn't even exist.

In Fort Myers, Fla., almost all the Red Sox have them, including pitcher Curt Schilling. New Astro Roger Clemens has more than one.


And in Surprise, the Royals are catching Hummer fever, too. On most days, there are four H2s outside the clubhouse. Count on more as the season moves along.


The newest trucks are both about three weeks old. The white one belongs to Mike Sweeney. And that maroon one cranking up? That's Angel Berroa's, his gift to himself for last season's Rookie of the Year season. Berroa smiles at his shiny 25-inch wheels, wrapped in low-profile Pirellis.


(How much bigger, by the way, can rims get? Remember just a few years ago when the Cash Money boys heralded 18s? Now those are wedding bands. Vince Lombardi once said, "Inches make champions." Who knew he was talking about chrome Star Gazers? Oh, and didn't Lombardi also say, "Spinning isn't everything; it's the only thing"? )


Berroa's stereo is jumping, and his old car, a small Mitsubishi, is yesterday's news. This is how a star player should travel, with dolphins jumping across the LCD screen in time to the Latin music.


"Mmm, mmm," Berroa says, smirking a bit from his leather driver's seat. It's not just a car. It's not just a big car.


"A big, big car," Berroa says.


At Progressive Motors in Pompano Beach, Fla., where many pro athletes buy their cars, dealer Dustin Phillips has seen the price go down over the last year, from $6,000 to $7,000 over sticker to right around invoice. People from All-Pros to moms have been lining up.


"Everybody likes the cars," Phillips says. "We're doing the same for football players, hockey guys. It's a great-looking truck that is very versatile. You can put in the entertainment centers. We've got one here for sale with navigation, four monitors, DVD, three 750-watt amps in the ceiling. I think it's more of a fad, too."


For dealers, there are no better poster children than professional athletes. Fans see them cruising around and want to be like them. Next thing you know, Joe Accountant with some self-esteem issues is buying an M1 Abrams. Just like that.


"Right now," says Royals catcher Benito Santiago, who owns a car-customizing shop in Tampa, Fla., "they're the new model."


Blame it on boys and their toys. That's why Sweeney took the plunge right before spring training. Tahoe, out. H2, in.


"I stepped it up a little," he says, grinning. "I got a pay raise."


It's not just for show, Sweeney is quick to point out. He has a wife and a new baby boy. When he's not carting Michael around the building, being the typical obnoxious, albeit loving father, he wants the little slugger to be safe.


"It's smooth," he says. "It rides like an Escalade or a Tahoe. (Shara) likes it. Especially having a new baby; it's a big, strong car. If there was an accident, it would probably just ding the car."


New Royal and old jokester Matt Stairs can confirm. The folks at Hummer aren't playing around.


"When I had the H1," he says, "I could literally do whatever I wanted. I've hit trees and taken them off their roots."


Not everyone is sold on the Hummer-as-family-car theory. Country singer Garth Brooks — who said Tuesday that he was "hanging out with three underage women (his daughters), and you can print that" — doesn't approve of them. He knows what it's like to shuttle kids around, and the H2 doesn't have what it takes. Too much sizzle and not enough steak.


"They're popular," Brooks says. "I don't know why. They still only seat four."


For now, though, the why doesn't matter — although a quirky tax break given for owners of trucks weighing more than 6,000 pounds can explain the phenomenon a bit. The H2s are all the rage, for a little while longer at least.


"It will die out," Stairs says, "As soon as the H4 comes out."


As for that next big thing, it will probably hit here first. Over in a corner of the clubhouse Wednesday, pitchers Kevin Appier and Greg Swindell talked about cars. Appier had seen this special on television about the Army replacing old-fashioned Hummers with Ford F-350s and Chevy one-ton pick-up trucks.


"They modified them, of course," Appier says. "They were showing them going through 4 feet of water."


And so another day passes in the world of major-league baseball, where the only things bigger than the talent are the toys. Disposable income needs to be disposed of, and players sure like to treat themselves.


"If I make it to the last week," says Swindell, who's fighting for a roster spot, "I might rent one."


Jason

[Jason]

Fun read:

The boys of Hummer

By WRIGHT THOMPSON, The Kansas City Star

SURPRISE, Ariz. — Yeah, yeah, professional baseball is about World Series rings and pennants and game-ending home runs. But come on, let's be real. All those things are just a means to an end, a way for athletes to get what they really want: big trucks. Huge freakin' trucks. And if they add some huge rims, well, all the better.


The current SUV du jour is the H2, and the players' parking lots this spring seem like Hummer dealerships. From the looks of it, if it weren't for pro athletes, the hybrid ex-Army tanks wouldn't even exist.

In Fort Myers, Fla., almost all the Red Sox have them, including pitcher Curt Schilling. New Astro Roger Clemens has more than one.


And in Surprise, the Royals are catching Hummer fever, too. On most days, there are four H2s outside the clubhouse. Count on more as the season moves along.


The newest trucks are both about three weeks old. The white one belongs to Mike Sweeney. And that maroon one cranking up? That's Angel Berroa's, his gift to himself for last season's Rookie of the Year season. Berroa smiles at his shiny 25-inch wheels, wrapped in low-profile Pirellis.


(How much bigger, by the way, can rims get? Remember just a few years ago when the Cash Money boys heralded 18s? Now those are wedding bands. Vince Lombardi once said, "Inches make champions." Who knew he was talking about chrome Star Gazers? Oh, and didn't Lombardi also say, "Spinning isn't everything; it's the only thing"? )


Berroa's stereo is jumping, and his old car, a small Mitsubishi, is yesterday's news. This is how a star player should travel, with dolphins jumping across the LCD screen in time to the Latin music.


"Mmm, mmm," Berroa says, smirking a bit from his leather driver's seat. It's not just a car. It's not just a big car.


"A big, big car," Berroa says.


At Progressive Motors in Pompano Beach, Fla., where many pro athletes buy their cars, dealer Dustin Phillips has seen the price go down over the last year, from $6,000 to $7,000 over sticker to right around invoice. People from All-Pros to moms have been lining up.


"Everybody likes the cars," Phillips says. "We're doing the same for football players, hockey guys. It's a great-looking truck that is very versatile. You can put in the entertainment centers. We've got one here for sale with navigation, four monitors, DVD, three 750-watt amps in the ceiling. I think it's more of a fad, too."


For dealers, there are no better poster children than professional athletes. Fans see them cruising around and want to be like them. Next thing you know, Joe Accountant with some self-esteem issues is buying an M1 Abrams. Just like that.


"Right now," says Royals catcher Benito Santiago, who owns a car-customizing shop in Tampa, Fla., "they're the new model."


Blame it on boys and their toys. That's why Sweeney took the plunge right before spring training. Tahoe, out. H2, in.


"I stepped it up a little," he says, grinning. "I got a pay raise."


It's not just for show, Sweeney is quick to point out. He has a wife and a new baby boy. When he's not carting Michael around the building, being the typical obnoxious, albeit loving father, he wants the little slugger to be safe.


"It's smooth," he says. "It rides like an Escalade or a Tahoe. (Shara) likes it. Especially having a new baby; it's a big, strong car. If there was an accident, it would probably just ding the car."


New Royal and old jokester Matt Stairs can confirm. The folks at Hummer aren't playing around.


"When I had the H1," he says, "I could literally do whatever I wanted. I've hit trees and taken them off their roots."


Not everyone is sold on the Hummer-as-family-car theory. Country singer Garth Brooks — who said Tuesday that he was "hanging out with three underage women (his daughters), and you can print that" — doesn't approve of them. He knows what it's like to shuttle kids around, and the H2 doesn't have what it takes. Too much sizzle and not enough steak.


"They're popular," Brooks says. "I don't know why. They still only seat four."


For now, though, the why doesn't matter — although a quirky tax break given for owners of trucks weighing more than 6,000 pounds can explain the phenomenon a bit. The H2s are all the rage, for a little while longer at least.


"It will die out," Stairs says, "As soon as the H4 comes out."


As for that next big thing, it will probably hit here first. Over in a corner of the clubhouse Wednesday, pitchers Kevin Appier and Greg Swindell talked about cars. Appier had seen this special on television about the Army replacing old-fashioned Hummers with Ford F-350s and Chevy one-ton pick-up trucks.


"They modified them, of course," Appier says. "They were showing them going through 4 feet of water."


And so another day passes in the world of major-league baseball, where the only things bigger than the talent are the toys. Disposable income needs to be disposed of, and players sure like to treat themselves.


"If I make it to the last week," says Swindell, who's fighting for a roster spot, "I might rent one."


Jason

[Jason]

Fun read:

The boys of Hummer

By WRIGHT THOMPSON, The Kansas City Star

SURPRISE, Ariz. — Yeah, yeah, professional baseball is about World Series rings and pennants and game-ending home runs. But come on, let's be real. All those things are just a means to an end, a way for athletes to get what they really want: big trucks. Huge freakin' trucks. And if they add some huge rims, well, all the better.


The current SUV du jour is the H2, and the players' parking lots this spring seem like Hummer dealerships. From the looks of it, if it weren't for pro athletes, the hybrid ex-Army tanks wouldn't even exist.

In Fort Myers, Fla., almost all the Red Sox have them, including pitcher Curt Schilling. New Astro Roger Clemens has more than one.


And in Surprise, the Royals are catching Hummer fever, too. On most days, there are four H2s outside the clubhouse. Count on more as the season moves along.


The newest trucks are both about three weeks old. The white one belongs to Mike Sweeney. And that maroon one cranking up? That's Angel Berroa's, his gift to himself for last season's Rookie of the Year season. Berroa smiles at his shiny 25-inch wheels, wrapped in low-profile Pirellis.


(How much bigger, by the way, can rims get? Remember just a few years ago when the Cash Money boys heralded 18s? Now those are wedding bands. Vince Lombardi once said, "Inches make champions." Who knew he was talking about chrome Star Gazers? Oh, and didn't Lombardi also say, "Spinning isn't everything; it's the only thing"? )


Berroa's stereo is jumping, and his old car, a small Mitsubishi, is yesterday's news. This is how a star player should travel, with dolphins jumping across the LCD screen in time to the Latin music.


"Mmm, mmm," Berroa says, smirking a bit from his leather driver's seat. It's not just a car. It's not just a big car.


"A big, big car," Berroa says.


At Progressive Motors in Pompano Beach, Fla., where many pro athletes buy their cars, dealer Dustin Phillips has seen the price go down over the last year, from $6,000 to $7,000 over sticker to right around invoice. People from All-Pros to moms have been lining up.


"Everybody likes the cars," Phillips says. "We're doing the same for football players, hockey guys. It's a great-looking truck that is very versatile. You can put in the entertainment centers. We've got one here for sale with navigation, four monitors, DVD, three 750-watt amps in the ceiling. I think it's more of a fad, too."


For dealers, there are no better poster children than professional athletes. Fans see them cruising around and want to be like them. Next thing you know, Joe Accountant with some self-esteem issues is buying an M1 Abrams. Just like that.


"Right now," says Royals catcher Benito Santiago, who owns a car-customizing shop in Tampa, Fla., "they're the new model."


Blame it on boys and their toys. That's why Sweeney took the plunge right before spring training. Tahoe, out. H2, in.


"I stepped it up a little," he says, grinning. "I got a pay raise."


It's not just for show, Sweeney is quick to point out. He has a wife and a new baby boy. When he's not carting Michael around the building, being the typical obnoxious, albeit loving father, he wants the little slugger to be safe.


"It's smooth," he says. "It rides like an Escalade or a Tahoe. (Shara) likes it. Especially having a new baby; it's a big, strong car. If there was an accident, it would probably just ding the car."


New Royal and old jokester Matt Stairs can confirm. The folks at Hummer aren't playing around.


"When I had the H1," he says, "I could literally do whatever I wanted. I've hit trees and taken them off their roots."


Not everyone is sold on the Hummer-as-family-car theory. Country singer Garth Brooks — who said Tuesday that he was "hanging out with three underage women (his daughters), and you can print that" — doesn't approve of them. He knows what it's like to shuttle kids around, and the H2 doesn't have what it takes. Too much sizzle and not enough steak.


"They're popular," Brooks says. "I don't know why. They still only seat four."


For now, though, the why doesn't matter — although a quirky tax break given for owners of trucks weighing more than 6,000 pounds can explain the phenomenon a bit. The H2s are all the rage, for a little while longer at least.


"It will die out," Stairs says, "As soon as the H4 comes out."


As for that next big thing, it will probably hit here first. Over in a corner of the clubhouse Wednesday, pitchers Kevin Appier and Greg Swindell talked about cars. Appier had seen this special on television about the Army replacing old-fashioned Hummers with Ford F-350s and Chevy one-ton pick-up trucks.


"They modified them, of course," Appier says. "They were showing them going through 4 feet of water."


And so another day passes in the world of major-league baseball, where the only things bigger than the talent are the toys. Disposable income needs to be disposed of, and players sure like to treat themselves.


"If I make it to the last week," says Swindell, who's fighting for a roster spot, "I might rent one."


Jason